Happiness and writing away the darkness

Art saved me; it got me through my depression and self-loathing, back to a place of innocence. ~Jeanette Winterson

Something most people who know me don’t know, even some who know me quite well, is that I suffer from minor bouts of depression.  Very rarely have these dips, as I refer to them, ever had a significant impact on my life, they are not debilitating and I’m grateful for that.  I have friends who suffer from significant bouts of depression and my heart goes out to them.  It is hard to explain to anyone who has never dealt with this to understand the weight the darkness can have on you, how all-encompassing it can be, no matter how bright the light or how wonderful your life or the people in it.

 For me, when I was in my early twenties, I discovered a need to write.  Now, over twenty years later writing has become an integral part of my life.  It has been a tool by which I have expressed joy, dealt with sadness and death, and even publicly worked to help people bring more happiness into their life.  I am happy to say that writing has also helped me with my dips.  Today, and this is often how it happens, for no reason at all my mood turned.  There was no specific act, no tragedy, nothing you could put your finger on but it happened.  As night fell, I sat down to eat dinner and watch some television and eventually turned to my laptop to write.  The words left my body and expressed my mood and happily took much of the negative energy with them.  Writing this right now I feel better than I have all day, this is no magic bullet, I’m not joyous and smiling, but I’m much better than I was earlier and I hold out the hope that the morning will bring the sun , a new day and a new attitude.

For those of you who may have similar issues I hope you can find similar mechanisms to drain the negativity.  If you’ve never tried writing, either prose , poetry or journaling, give it a try, maybe it will work for you as well, if not find another way.  The link below will guide you to some basic and simple things that can help you out, they have helped me in the past and continue to:

http://www.countwordula.com/depression-affects-productivity-10-tips-for-fighting-it/

Finally I’ll share the piece I wrote tonight, and friends, I’m doing fine, have a happy day.

Ephemeral Tendrils                                                                                                  3/27/11

And the world turns sad tonight
there is no rhyme or reason to it
the ephemeral tendrils
of what it is to be connected
drift from my grasp

Finding myself adrift
edge to edge and off the ledge
floating into nothing
grasping
for what I do not know

In my mind this night
forsaking all hope of connection
life grows hopeless, inane
there is no point
no direction, no hope

No attachment fits
not love or friendship
no contact here
just me and these keys
the lack of solace of this night

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About revmichaelkane

Michael Kane is an educator, change agent, adventurer and general sampler of life.
This entry was posted in personal happiness and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Happiness and writing away the darkness

  1. Suzette says:

    I really am enjoying this blog. For some reason each posting seems to be addressing my current needs Today I have been trying to drain negative thoughts and erase the fever left from a bad romance. Because of your blog I found an online journal. No one will see my writing but I think it will help. Thanks S

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